Tuanku Suroh Roboh

Selepas Majlis Pelancaran SJER, Perdana Menteri ditanya wartawan dalam Press Conference.

Wartawan: Adakah YAB terkejut dengan titah Tuanku berkenaan Tambak Johor harus dirobohkan?

YDP: Saya tidak terkejut. Saya terjaga sebab dengaq orang tepuk tangan kuat sgt.

hehehe... He did his operation MonsterBall, his all game now.

Sila Lihat:

Selepas pelancaran itu, beliau sebenarnya telah segera berlepas ke Pakistan untuk satu acara OIC tanpa memberi Press Conference. Semasa di atas pentas, salah seorang ahli Panel telah bercakap mengenai OIC Reform. Ini tentu merupakan satu tamparan kepada Pengerusi OIC yang ada di atas pentas yang sama.

Sepatutnya beliau mempertahankan polisi OIC. Agak-agak apa yang beliau cakap masa gilirannya? Menjawab persoalan itu? Ohhh ... tentu tidak. Mestilah pasal Islam ada Had dan Islam ada Hari.

Berbalik kepada peristiwa dengan DYMM Tuanku Sultan Johor, kita jangan lupa bahawa SJER adalah ide dari Dolah, antara banyak ide-ideanya. Sila baca di sini. hehehe

Jika jambatan diroboh, kita boleh bina sektor pengangkutan antarabangsa. SJER hanya permainan hartanah yang menyerahkan kedaulatan (sovereignty) negara kepada Singapura melalui Free Access Zone.

Inilah dia bapak mertua si-balau, Tuanku!!!

* YDP bermakna Yang Disalah Pileh

My friends call me Mr. Nori

The Malaysian blogging community was startled with the revelation by RPK that Pak Lah would stick around for 3 terms, enough time for Khairy to work his way up in UMNO and jump over Dato Najib. Some suspect the view could have come from Tun Dr Mahathir.

However, the R.A.H.M.A.N. theory would remain because N = Nori's husband.

Rumours are a buzz on the reason for Khairy's confidence and brevity to plan a blueprint called Black Babboon Blueprint . It is believed that the revelation came during a burglary at his home.

The burglar is said to have broken in into Khairy and Nori's while they were sleeping.

After tying both of them down, he had put a knife to Nori's neck and ready to slash her becasue she was yelling and screaming. Before doing so, he yelled to her, "What is your name?"

"Why you wanna know?!!!", Nori yelled.

The burglar answered, "I must know the names of my victims".

"My name is Nori," she replied bravely.

After a brief pause, the burglar decide against slashing her. "You remind me of my grandmother who was also named Nori, so I can't cut you." He said and leered his eyes at Khairy.

The smart Khairy spontaneously said, "My name is Khairy, but my friends call me Mr. Nori."

P/S The original joke came from Forum My KMU

Pump Attendant

Khairy and Nori are vacationing out of town and stop at a gas station to fill up. The attendant comes out and fills up their car and when he leans over to collect the money he and Nori recognize one another and begin making small talk.

When they finally leave Khairy asks her who she was talking to and she says it was her first boyfriend from back in secondary school.

Khairy says that's nice and teasingly asks her, "Do you ever think about what life would be like if things had been different and you would have married him instead of me?"

To which Nori responds, "Yes I do. You would be pumping gas and he would be the vice head of the UMNO Youth."

P/S Read this or sini. Make sense?

Its A Very Funny Joke

Abdullah was speaking at a business lunch in Tokyo, where he decided to open his speech with a brief joke which is an anecdote of a translation problem in Japan. He told the joke and waited for the translator to announce the Japanese version.

Even though the story was quite long, Abdullah was surprised by how quickly the interpreter was able to re-tell it. Even more impressive was the reaction from the crowd. Abdullah knew the story was cute, but not outright hilarious, yet the crowd could broke into a laughter. Abdullah was very flattered.

After the speech, Abdullah met the translator to know how he told the joke. Perhaps there is better way to tell the joke? When Abdullah asked, the translator responded, "I told them, 'Prime Minister Abdullah has told a very funny joke. Please laugh now."

Joke taken from Forum MyKMU.

On a serious and comedic note, read Ibnu Hakeem's The Malaysian Comedy.

Dinar Dollah

Pada November 13hb, 2006, Bank Negara Malaysia mengumumkan pengeluaran siling emas sebagai memperingati RMK 9 yang diwar-warkan sebagai era Islam Hadhari dan zaman Cemerlang, Gemilang, dan Terbilang.

Untuk betul-betul mencerminkan zaman Dolah Badawi, siling emas yang saya panggil Dinar Dollah, layak berupa seperti berikut:






















Sekiranya Dinar Dollah digunakan dan matawang Amerika dihentikan penggunaan, maka "Cemerlang, Gemilang, dan Terbilang"lah negara-negara Islam dalam keHadharian.

Tapi agak-agak dia yakin ke untuk menghancurkan Amerika melalui ekonomi dan matawangnya? Muat turun dan baca yang telah dimerahkan dari sini.

A Chicken Crossed The Road

A chicken have crossed the road. Then the media or the press have interview the leader of the UMNO, MCA and MIC to have their comment. Here are the interview:

Press : "Pak Lah, the chicken have crossed the road!"
Pak Lah : "Malaysia ialah sebuah negara demokrasi, jadi ayam pun diberi kebebasan untuk pergi mana dia suka."

Press : "Datuk Seri Ong, the chicken have crossed the road!"
Datuk Seri Ong Ka Ting : "Malaysia is a democratic country and even a chicken is allowed to crossed the road."

Press : "Datuk Seri Samy, the chicken have crossed the road!"
Datuk Seri S. Samy Vellu : "What chicken? Who is this chicken? Does he pay the toll?!"

P/S Samy ayo yo, 60% naik ke? Banyaklah kamu temberang. Baca ini.

Masam-Masam Manis II

What do we ask the pupils to recite for the above caption?

Perdana Menteri teraba
Sekali-sekali Perdana Menteri teraba

The Leadership of "Islam Hadhari" ... that personal touch hehehe ....

Masam Masam Manis I

I cannot forget the innocent scene where Cikgu Shaari enters class, wrote something on the blackboard, and ask each pupil to stand and recite:

Cikgu suka main bola
Tiap-tiap hari cikgu main bola

Till a kid noticing the teacher dozing off at his table and chair, catching up on his sleep from his late night performance at the Silver Tortoise Kalabul Malami, start to recite it differently.

Cikgu suka tidor
Tiap-tiap hari cikgu tidor

Unfortunately the kids got a bit excited and the Headmaster walked in .... hehehe

I've got some "walked in" captions below and we can have similar recitations, can we?















Perdana Menteri suka tidor
Tiap-tiap Majlis Perdana Menteri tidor

The Leadership of "Cemerlang, Gemilang, dan Terbilang"! Selalu nampaknya "main bola" ...

Fortune of Growing Old

Don't be afraid to grow old. Old folks are worth a fortune.

They have silver in their hair, gold in their teeth, stones in their kidney, and gas in their stomach.

Not to mentioned, kencing pun manis, dan darah pun ada kelas ... tinggi!

I am just too glad to hear of Tun Dr Mahathir's latest health condition here.

The Mind or Mine?

Einstein is known for his Genius Mind. Newton is known is known for his Extraordinary Mind. Bill Gates a Brilliant Mind, Dr Mahathir as Master Mind and ....

.... Abdullah Ahmad Badawi? NEVER MIND lah!


Addition: ....hmmm Musa Aman, CM of Sabah? ALL MINE!!!!

Sadik Sigara

"Khairy! Khairy, kamu punya pasallah rakyat marah dengan baba", kata Pak Lah pada Menantunya.

"Baba marah?", kata Khairy. "Kalau Baba marah, nanti kena jual?"

"Taakkk! Tidak, Baba tidak marah", Pak Lah menjawab. "Juallah, Juallah apa kau nak?"

Dikemaskini pada hari Krismis 26hb Desimber

Khairy, penasihat-penasihat, pembesar-pembesar, dan rakan-rakan pun menjual dan menjual dan menjual ....

... broker-broker, talipon, bank - bank, kereta, suratkhabar - suratkhabar, telivisyen, helicopter, kedai repair, jambatan, kapal terbang - kapal terbang, hospital - hospital, pasir , hartanah, tanah - tanah, negeri, tepong, gula, minyak makan, periok, pulau, ladang - ladang, rumah-rumah mewah dan orang-orang sekali....

Satu hari habis perniagaan Bapak Mertua diserbu ramai-ramai secara percuma, Khairy bertanya "Baba tak marah kan?" Dengan lekas, Pak Lah menjawab "Tidakkk! Seronok! Jangan lupa ya, jual sekali ... keretapi - keretapi, tanah orang, minyak petrol, minyak pelincir, kompeni minyak, lapangan kapalterbang, pelabohan - pelabohan, ... dan negara sekali!"

"Lepas itu belikan Baba kapal layar dan tongkang ... untuk memancing dan bersiar-siar, ye?", kata Pak Lah. Khairy menjawab dengan nada sedih, "Saya rugi, banyak rugi, Baba..."

"Hai, banyak kau lelong harta (aku) boleh rugi ...????", Pak Lah hairan. "Pengsan aku ... bankruppppp!!!!!"

Scene di atas hanyalah sebuah fiction yang diciplak dari Filem P Ramlee, Tiga Abdul. Nama-nama yang disebut adalah orang betul ... hehehe